For so many of us, our twenties were riddled with trying to figure out how to build our careers, leaving ourselves out of the equation. Luckily, the world has taken a turn, and focus on mental health and proper balances in life has taken center stage from a young age. Hobby selection is such an important step towards obtaining that balance and creating an escape during times when things get hard. Your twenties are meant for new experiences, growing your career and finding yourself, but your thirties are when you can finally afford the new experiences, become established in your career, and finally understand who you are as a person. This is when the ‘Don’t give a damn’ attitude kicks in and your inhibitions become as free as a twenty-something on silver tequila. You probably had some natural reflex when you read the word.
It is so important to have hobbies incorporated into your day-to-day life. Whether it is in small mindful practices, like journaling, or in larger practices, such as creating something or going to the gym every day. I don’t find a lot of comfort in the latter, as repetitive practices that feel like work do not mesh well with my brain. So, if you are like me and you need something more stimulating (and dare I say, more exciting? The only reason I have to go to the gym is to appreciate the views, but apparently that is frowned upon), then I have three suggestions you might love.
Invincible Hobby #1 Pole-dancing
In 2020, when I first moved to Johannesburg, I was looking for a new hobby to try. With moving to a new city (right in the middle of a pandemic, I might add), I needed to find a way to meet new people and find something to keep fit and busy with. I stumbled on two options that would allow for socializing but still doing something in partial isolation. The first was hip-hop dancing, and the second was pole dancing. Being too self-conscious to act on these desires, I shied away from both options (keeping to my regular friend group).
Once I moved to Cape Town (late 2022), I found out that there was a pole dancing studio not far from my work. It still took a year to muster up the courage to actually go there (yes, I talked one of my close friends into coming with me). So, on a warm October afternoon, we went, and I was hooked from the moment I walked in.
It is incredible how strong you have to be to be able to do the moves successfully. Moreover, it requires so much confidence and trust to look effortless while basically hanging upside down on a 45mm thick steel pole. Through pole dancing, you will learn how to be confident and strong. Every time I do an invert, or something from out of an invert, I can hardly believe my body is now able to do that. You will learn to trust yourself and your body. For those of us who work in highly stressful and demanding jobs, it quickly becomes a solace.
Invincible Hobby #2 Horseback riding
This might not be an unconventional hobby by any means. However, starting the sport at such a late stage certainly would be considered unconventional. I don’t know if any 32-year-olds or older out there have a miniature complex about turning thirty-three, but for me, this year seems like such a monumental birthday. Thus, in February, I started horseback riding. Following the decision to do everything I’ve always wanted to do but never dared to.
What this has offered is a new community of people with personalities I don’t think I’ve ever come across (being in the consulting industry, you do tend to mix with a number of personalities, but none quite like avid riders). Beyond this, your stomach and leg muscles will hate you for the first few weeks (honestly, it’s been two months and my legs still wobble every time my feet hit the floor). Soon, even with other sports, you will feel the difference in yourself. It provides a different kind of strength than what is provided through pole dancing.
I ride on Friday afternoons, after work. What I’ve found is that because you are focusing on so many things at once (including not falling off of hunk of muscle beneath you), it provides a hard stop to the week. In those moments, you are forced to forget about everyone and everything else and just be there with your horse. That bond with the horse is so precious. I am proud to announce that my regular ride, a beautiful brown stallion, now responds when I call him closer to be tacked.
Invincible Hobby #3 Carpentry
Want to feel completely invincible and like you don’t need someone else to do things for you? Start doing carpentry projects. Even if it is just for yourself. In 2023, when I moved into my place, I vowed to do most of the furnishings myself. The exception to this is my actual bed (let’s not be completely ridiculous about this – I looked into it, it seemed like more trouble than it was worth) and my chest of drawers (once again looked a bit to high for my paygrade).
Over the course of the last two years, I have built (with my own two hands and with no help from anyone) a kitchen island, a side table, a bathroom cabinet, a headboard for my bed and a desk. The only outstanding things are the couch and the TV unit that I still want to get cracking on. The aim is to have these two done before my birthday in May.
There is a certain sense of accomplishment that comes with building your own furniture. A sense of pride I can’t really describe to anyone else. Once done with those two items, I may just share what my apartment looks like with all of the furnishings in.
Other hobbies to try your hand at
There are multiple other hobbies you, as a thirty something can try your hand at. A couple of other hobbies you can try, that carries an equal amount of pride and accomplishment but are perhaps more to the speed of business-orientated women. These include sewing, painting, and writing (fiction or non-fiction). What is great about the first two hobbies is that both carry a sense of immediate gratification, whereas writing takes some time to get the hang of. Especially if your day job consists of a lot of screen time. What makes both sewing and painting fantastic in their own rights is that both allow you to enter into a Zen state and therefore helps to further relax into the moment.
Whether you are an adrenalin junky, or a woman who enjoys slow, meditative practices to destress and let go. The importance of having hobbies you truly enjoy cannot be highlighted enough. It is through exploring new hobbies that you learn new forms of expression you may never have thought about, you gain confidence, not only in yourself (believing you can do things), but also in your mind (knowing you can do something) and your body (seeing the things you can do).
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